Amy Patterson – “My Thoughts”
I’ve had a pretty good week, overall. This means I have very little to rant and rave about, and, in my mind, very little to write a column about. But I’m going to give the people what I tell myself they want and do it anyway.
This week, I’m going to tell a few jokes, because I think that sounds like fun, and who doesn’t like fun or jokes? Nobody.
Before I begin, I don’t know about the legalities of this, but I’m pretty sure I’m supposed to tell you I don’t own these jokes. Or something. Whatever.
Q: What did the dad buffalo say to his son on the first day of school?
^^Ha. That one’s stupid, but I love puns.
Q: What do you call a sleepwalking nun?
A: A Roamin’ Catholic.
^^Double Ha! I hope my fellow Catholics appreciate that one.
Q: Why did the rapper carry an umbrella?
A: Fo’ drizzle.
Q: Why does a Moon-rock taste better than an Earth-rock?
A: Because it’s a little meteor.
Q; Where does George Washington keep his armies?
A; In his sleevies
^^Oh.My.Gosh. I laughed really loud when I read that one.
Q: What did one hat say to another?
A: You stay here, I’ll go on a head!
^^Go on a head. Ha!
“There’s two fish in a tank. One turns to the other and says ‘You man the guns, I’ll drive’.”
^^Everybody knows fish can’t drive.
Q: Why did the cowboy adopt a weiner dog?
A: He wanted to get a long little doggy!
^^One of my absolute favorites.
“Have you heard the one about the Corduroy pillow? It’s making headlines!”
^^Corduroy jokes are always classy.
Q: What is Bruce Lee’s favorite drink?
^^Get it? Like water, but kung-foo-ish.
Q: What do clouds wear under their shorts?